Sexual exploitation
Children involved in prostitution are victims of abuse and sexual exploitation. They may believe that they are making informed choices, but are usually coerced into such a lifestyle by others. For example, it is common for a girl to think that the pimp who controls every aspect of her life is her boyfriend and she remains loyal to him despite the fact that he forces her to have sex with many men and beats her if she refuses. Similarly, boys abused through prostitution rarely see themselves as victims of abusive sexual behaviour.
"He bought me clothes, jewellery, expensive rings, and told me he'd be with me forever, never leave me or hurt me. But all I have got out of my life is a drugs problem and lots of beatings,"Jane, aged 16, speaking about her pimp
The true extent of abuse of children and young people through prostitution is unknown because most activity takes place behind closed doors. The hidden nature of this heinous crime makes it easier for abusing adults to continue enslaving and selling children. The internet and mobile phones have also unfortunately made this sickening ‘trade’ in children easier as it is now possible to watch as children are abused.
The facts
We work with girls as young as ten and boys as young as eleven who are known to have been abused through prostitution
The horrific abuse these children suffer can be extreme; they are raped, sexually assaulted, suffer bruises, burns and broken bones
The pain of children’s experiences often shows itself in self-destructive behaviour such as self-mutilation, overdosing and eating disorders.
"Do you think I just woke up one day and thought ‘I’ll be a rent boy today?’ Thousands of things have happened to get me here - mum leaving, no-one at home, hanging around the pub waiting for dad, blokes trying to touch us up, seeing boys do tricks and getting cash and fags"14 year old boy abused through prostitution.
How Barnardo's helps
Barnardo’s runs 29 sexual exploitation projects that offer a safe, confidential environment where young people can go for help, advice and support. They provide food, bath and laundry facilities as well as advice and information on accommodation, careers, contraception, sexual health and drug use.
Our project workers actively seek out the young people, offering them someone to talk to and the long-term support they need if they want to change their way of life. The projects also work extremely closely with the police to bring about the prosecution of the perpetrators of sexual exploitation. Our research suggests that what we do to help young people who are sexually exploited does work.
We also campaign to raise awareness of the issues and our efforts have influenced the government to change law and policy throughout the UK. This includes the Sexual Offences Act 2003 which was the first major overhaul of sexual offences legislation for more than a century.
Tuesday, 29 January 2008
Sunday, 27 January 2008
Cotton wool
I was physically sick yesterday with worry, I doubt anyone noticed why.
My son had arranged to go to the local shopping centre with mates, old enough to be trusted and buses reliable why should I worry?
This time last year my daughter did the same thing,the only problem is that she wasn't with mates as she had promised, instead she had met up with a man who it turns out had a history of grooming young girls. It has now been nearly 10 months since we saw her, the odd meeting to the local shopping centre soon became much more worrying, days turned into weeks her behaviour and attitude to life changing completely.
I will never understand how someone can gain so much control over a girl who was so independant and free thinking, we are still left with so many unanswered questions.
My loving son returned home as promised before 6pm, happy with his day of independance.
My nerves now calmed I know I can't wrap him in cotton wool, it doesn't stop me from giving him the biggest hug imaginable.
When I look at him I often wonder what his sister would say, would she recognise him now, what would she think to his style of dress, his new taste in music, I hope that one day soon we will all find out.
My son had arranged to go to the local shopping centre with mates, old enough to be trusted and buses reliable why should I worry?
This time last year my daughter did the same thing,the only problem is that she wasn't with mates as she had promised, instead she had met up with a man who it turns out had a history of grooming young girls. It has now been nearly 10 months since we saw her, the odd meeting to the local shopping centre soon became much more worrying, days turned into weeks her behaviour and attitude to life changing completely.
I will never understand how someone can gain so much control over a girl who was so independant and free thinking, we are still left with so many unanswered questions.
My loving son returned home as promised before 6pm, happy with his day of independance.
My nerves now calmed I know I can't wrap him in cotton wool, it doesn't stop me from giving him the biggest hug imaginable.
When I look at him I often wonder what his sister would say, would she recognise him now, what would she think to his style of dress, his new taste in music, I hope that one day soon we will all find out.
Friday, 25 January 2008
The ups and downs of emotions
During the last year we have all learnt to deal with changing emotions,sometimes we can deal with it and sometimes we can't.
Sometimes the dark days go on forever,sometimes its just a few minutes of despair.
Reading back through last years diary brings back a whole mass of emotions that although never forgotten somehow don't seem as bad now.
Perhaps people are right when they say time heals all wounds,perhaps we have just become hardened to the scum of this world and evil tactics they use.
When people ask me to explain sexual grooming and the effects it has on the families concerned they always seem shocked,I guess we would have been a year ago.Now of course its just everyday life to us,we take it in our stride,the phone calls from police officers seem normal,the thought of living a normal life again seems like a fairy tale.
I still feel really confused by the laws relating to children,I am my daughters legal guardian if the authorities wish to prosecute me,however if I want to exert some control over the current situation then I have no rights as a parent.
Today I was really encouraged after talking to the police,there seems to be some hope for the outcome we are fighting for,sadly that was soon squished by a call about the dreaded 'wasps'.
I have always been an honest person and take pride in giving good customer service in my job
so I find it really hard to deal with people who are supposed to be some sort of authority in the welfare of children.These people lie to make themselves sound better and to be honest wouldn't know good customer service if it jumped up and smacked them in the face.
Along with most parents in our situation,we have discovered that the authorities don't give a damn about the welfare of the child,all they want is to get rid of the case as fast as possible.
Sadly for them,they may be able to forget the child but the parents don't give up easily.
For all the girls out there who have been exploited by men pretending to be boyfriends,the fight will go on,some families will never give up on their children,no matter what!
Sometimes the dark days go on forever,sometimes its just a few minutes of despair.
Reading back through last years diary brings back a whole mass of emotions that although never forgotten somehow don't seem as bad now.
Perhaps people are right when they say time heals all wounds,perhaps we have just become hardened to the scum of this world and evil tactics they use.
When people ask me to explain sexual grooming and the effects it has on the families concerned they always seem shocked,I guess we would have been a year ago.Now of course its just everyday life to us,we take it in our stride,the phone calls from police officers seem normal,the thought of living a normal life again seems like a fairy tale.
I still feel really confused by the laws relating to children,I am my daughters legal guardian if the authorities wish to prosecute me,however if I want to exert some control over the current situation then I have no rights as a parent.
Today I was really encouraged after talking to the police,there seems to be some hope for the outcome we are fighting for,sadly that was soon squished by a call about the dreaded 'wasps'.
I have always been an honest person and take pride in giving good customer service in my job
so I find it really hard to deal with people who are supposed to be some sort of authority in the welfare of children.These people lie to make themselves sound better and to be honest wouldn't know good customer service if it jumped up and smacked them in the face.
Along with most parents in our situation,we have discovered that the authorities don't give a damn about the welfare of the child,all they want is to get rid of the case as fast as possible.
Sadly for them,they may be able to forget the child but the parents don't give up easily.
For all the girls out there who have been exploited by men pretending to be boyfriends,the fight will go on,some families will never give up on their children,no matter what!
Wednesday, 23 January 2008
Victoria Sandwich
My son really wants a victoria sandwich with jam and butter cream,the only problem is we can't make one.
There is only one member of the family who has ever been able to make a good sponge cake and she hasn't been here for a long time.
It's really odd what reduces me to tears these days,the inability to make a cake is today's problem along with finding a pair of pink converse lurking at the back of the cupboard.
Social services tell us to forget we ever had a daughter but when you've loved a child so much it is absolutely impossible to forget,no matter what they tell us.
So what do I do about the cake,perhaps I should keep trying and keep producing frisbees,perhaps I should give in and accept the fact that we won't be eating them again.
For your little bro please come home and make a cake babes, just like you used to.
There is only one member of the family who has ever been able to make a good sponge cake and she hasn't been here for a long time.
It's really odd what reduces me to tears these days,the inability to make a cake is today's problem along with finding a pair of pink converse lurking at the back of the cupboard.
Social services tell us to forget we ever had a daughter but when you've loved a child so much it is absolutely impossible to forget,no matter what they tell us.
So what do I do about the cake,perhaps I should keep trying and keep producing frisbees,perhaps I should give in and accept the fact that we won't be eating them again.
For your little bro please come home and make a cake babes, just like you used to.
Tuesday, 22 January 2008
Countdown
My son knocked the stuffing out of me at the weekend,
Just a few little words but I was totally taken aback.
He sat quite calmly and said that there were 76 days to go,
although I knew what he was referring to I asked him,
"76 days until my sister has been gone for a year"
I can't be optimistic and say that she'll be home,not anymore
To do that I would have to feel it myself,I really wish she would come home,
After so long it's hard to imagine anymore
I long to hold her close,just like we used to,chat about daft girly things again
I dread the anniversary of her leaving and I'm not sure how any of us will cope
As this month progresses I look back and remember that this time last year our nightmare was just beginning,the carefree days seem like a lifetime ago.
Babes if by any chance you are reading this,PLEASE make contact,you may not be officially missing anymore but you haven't been seen now since November and I'm just as worried today as I was in April when you left
I love you babes
Just a few little words but I was totally taken aback.
He sat quite calmly and said that there were 76 days to go,
although I knew what he was referring to I asked him,
"76 days until my sister has been gone for a year"
I can't be optimistic and say that she'll be home,not anymore
To do that I would have to feel it myself,I really wish she would come home,
After so long it's hard to imagine anymore
I long to hold her close,just like we used to,chat about daft girly things again
I dread the anniversary of her leaving and I'm not sure how any of us will cope
As this month progresses I look back and remember that this time last year our nightmare was just beginning,the carefree days seem like a lifetime ago.
Babes if by any chance you are reading this,PLEASE make contact,you may not be officially missing anymore but you haven't been seen now since November and I'm just as worried today as I was in April when you left
I love you babes
Sunday, 20 January 2008
UK Internal trafficking
Group targets grooming of girls
Girls are threatened and isolated from their families. The scale of the problem of British girls being lured into prostitution in their own country is being examined by the Home Office.
A working group is being set up to examine "internal trafficking" of girls in their teens or younger.
In some cases, girls as young as 10 are believed to have been groomed by youths pretending to be boyfriends. They are passed on and end up in prostitution.
Campaigners said the authorities had been slow to react to the problem.
In a report seen by the BBC, the Home Office recommends that "the newly formed UK Internal Trafficking Group will seek to define the extent and nature of this phenomenon".
It can happen to any child from any family.
Home Office Minister Vernon Coaker confirmed it had commissioned work to examine internal trafficking.
He said a film was also being made to be shown in schools to warn children of the dangers.
"There's work going on with prosecuting authorities to make sure they're aware of this issue and understand it and then there's work going on in communities to make sure that people are aware of this as a potential problem," he said.
"We also want to have services that protect and support victims as well."
Threats and beatings
The BBC has learned that internal trafficking follows a typical pattern in which a girl aged about 12 is approached and won over by a good-looking, well-dressed teenage boy.
He gives her jewellery, mobile phones and later drink or drugs, and pretends to be her boyfriend.
"Emma" told the BBC she was groomed by a teenage boy
Once under his spell, the girl is turned against her parents and persuaded to have sex with her boyfriend's older "uncles" or "friends" to pay him back for the money he has spent on her.
Gradually, she finds herself spending all her time with the older men who force her, often with violence, to work as a prostitute.
Meanwhile, her original "boyfriend" is out targeting another young girl.
One victim Emma, which is not her real name, was targeted when she was 13.
"In schools we're always warned about a man in a white van, but we're never warned that someone nearly your own age could be targeting you to groom you for prostitution," she said.
Emma was too terrified to ask for help.
"They've threatened to rape my mum and make me watch," she said.
"Firebomb my house. Shoot me, shoot my family. They've threatened to do all sorts of things."
Parents 'bewildered'
Hilary Willmer, from the Coalition for the Removal of Pimping (Crop), said she had seen dozens of cases of internal trafficking.
Ms Willmer said: "It can happen to any child from any family. The men, the gangs have all the experience. The children, the families and the parents are bewildered, don't know what's happening."
She welcomed the Home Office action, but said part of the problem was the law.
The whole issue with trafficking is that it's a secret, covert crime and there's a great deal of control placed over the victims
Nick KinsellaUK Human Trafficking Centre
Once older than 13, a girl may be asked to give evidence in court against an attacker.
"In practice, unless the primary victim is prepared to give evidence then it's very difficult to make charges stick," Ms Willmer said.
"The men know this, so they often wait until the girls are 13 before actually having sex with them."
North Yorkshire Chief Constable Grahame Maxwell said many forces were aware of this problem and officers were now trying to piece together the national picture.
He said: "It is a very difficult crime to detect. We are talking about people who don't want to talk about things in the open.
"When they actually find out the extent to which the exploitation has been carried out on them, how much they have been abused, how much they've been forced to have sexual partners, it's a very difficult thing to comes to terms with."
The UK Human Trafficking Centre (UKHTC) in Sheffield recently appointed a dedicated detective sergeant to work on internal trafficking cases.
Nick Kinsella, head of the UKHTC, said the scale of the problem was unclear.
"The whole issue with trafficking is that it's a secret, covert crime and there's a great deal of control placed over the victims and so that's always difficult to break down irrespective of the age," he said.
Girls are threatened and isolated from their families. The scale of the problem of British girls being lured into prostitution in their own country is being examined by the Home Office.
A working group is being set up to examine "internal trafficking" of girls in their teens or younger.
In some cases, girls as young as 10 are believed to have been groomed by youths pretending to be boyfriends. They are passed on and end up in prostitution.
Campaigners said the authorities had been slow to react to the problem.
In a report seen by the BBC, the Home Office recommends that "the newly formed UK Internal Trafficking Group will seek to define the extent and nature of this phenomenon".
It can happen to any child from any family.
Home Office Minister Vernon Coaker confirmed it had commissioned work to examine internal trafficking.
He said a film was also being made to be shown in schools to warn children of the dangers.
"There's work going on with prosecuting authorities to make sure they're aware of this issue and understand it and then there's work going on in communities to make sure that people are aware of this as a potential problem," he said.
"We also want to have services that protect and support victims as well."
Threats and beatings
The BBC has learned that internal trafficking follows a typical pattern in which a girl aged about 12 is approached and won over by a good-looking, well-dressed teenage boy.
He gives her jewellery, mobile phones and later drink or drugs, and pretends to be her boyfriend.
"Emma" told the BBC she was groomed by a teenage boy
Once under his spell, the girl is turned against her parents and persuaded to have sex with her boyfriend's older "uncles" or "friends" to pay him back for the money he has spent on her.
Gradually, she finds herself spending all her time with the older men who force her, often with violence, to work as a prostitute.
Meanwhile, her original "boyfriend" is out targeting another young girl.
One victim Emma, which is not her real name, was targeted when she was 13.
"In schools we're always warned about a man in a white van, but we're never warned that someone nearly your own age could be targeting you to groom you for prostitution," she said.
Emma was too terrified to ask for help.
"They've threatened to rape my mum and make me watch," she said.
"Firebomb my house. Shoot me, shoot my family. They've threatened to do all sorts of things."
Parents 'bewildered'
Hilary Willmer, from the Coalition for the Removal of Pimping (Crop), said she had seen dozens of cases of internal trafficking.
Ms Willmer said: "It can happen to any child from any family. The men, the gangs have all the experience. The children, the families and the parents are bewildered, don't know what's happening."
She welcomed the Home Office action, but said part of the problem was the law.
The whole issue with trafficking is that it's a secret, covert crime and there's a great deal of control placed over the victims
Nick KinsellaUK Human Trafficking Centre
Once older than 13, a girl may be asked to give evidence in court against an attacker.
"In practice, unless the primary victim is prepared to give evidence then it's very difficult to make charges stick," Ms Willmer said.
"The men know this, so they often wait until the girls are 13 before actually having sex with them."
North Yorkshire Chief Constable Grahame Maxwell said many forces were aware of this problem and officers were now trying to piece together the national picture.
He said: "It is a very difficult crime to detect. We are talking about people who don't want to talk about things in the open.
"When they actually find out the extent to which the exploitation has been carried out on them, how much they have been abused, how much they've been forced to have sexual partners, it's a very difficult thing to comes to terms with."
The UK Human Trafficking Centre (UKHTC) in Sheffield recently appointed a dedicated detective sergeant to work on internal trafficking cases.
Nick Kinsella, head of the UKHTC, said the scale of the problem was unclear.
"The whole issue with trafficking is that it's a secret, covert crime and there's a great deal of control placed over the victims and so that's always difficult to break down irrespective of the age," he said.
Moving on
A colleague asked me yesterday why I hadn't forgotten about my daughter by now, is that what people really expect?
Could any mum ever forget 16 years of love?
Ask any mum in our situation how they feel and I'm sure they will tell you the same......you never give up hope!
Hope that one day your loving child will appear at the door, hope that the nightmare will be over, hope that the family will be truly happy again and most of all hope that the perpetrator is punished for his crimes.
Of course we will never be able to turn back time, some things have changed for good, physical things and emotional. For those of us left behind have changed, our lives have not panned out the way we had planned and the future remains very uncertain. But what of our daughter, what has happened to her life? We know that her man/boyfriend/pimp (call him what you will) has prevented the authorities from seeing her.we know that he has driven a wedge between her and her friends & family.We know that she has lost the opportunity to complete her education and yes sadly we know that she has been introduced to street drugs.
The door is always open, but how do we convey that message to her when we are not able to speak to her, hopefully the IP address in Bristol will log onto this blog again this week.
The rabbit hutch has now gone,the garden looks even more lonely,the house has lost its sparkle,
the grandparents have lost their only granddaughter.
Perhaps time heals all wounds as people say, but these wounds run deep and time isn't something that is in abundance for everyone.
So my love, if you read this, please take note-
Your family will always love you, no matter what,
You will NEVER be forgotten,
The door is always open,you just need to shout,
Please don't be a stranger, get in touch,
I long for you to be knocking at the door to say can I come in,
Rather than the police asking us to identify a body.
There is help out there for you,
Please just ask,
If it's the last thing I ever do,
I will fight for justice until the bitter end
I Love you babes & always will
Could any mum ever forget 16 years of love?
Ask any mum in our situation how they feel and I'm sure they will tell you the same......you never give up hope!
Hope that one day your loving child will appear at the door, hope that the nightmare will be over, hope that the family will be truly happy again and most of all hope that the perpetrator is punished for his crimes.
Of course we will never be able to turn back time, some things have changed for good, physical things and emotional. For those of us left behind have changed, our lives have not panned out the way we had planned and the future remains very uncertain. But what of our daughter, what has happened to her life? We know that her man/boyfriend/pimp (call him what you will) has prevented the authorities from seeing her.we know that he has driven a wedge between her and her friends & family.We know that she has lost the opportunity to complete her education and yes sadly we know that she has been introduced to street drugs.
The door is always open, but how do we convey that message to her when we are not able to speak to her, hopefully the IP address in Bristol will log onto this blog again this week.
The rabbit hutch has now gone,the garden looks even more lonely,the house has lost its sparkle,
the grandparents have lost their only granddaughter.
Perhaps time heals all wounds as people say, but these wounds run deep and time isn't something that is in abundance for everyone.
So my love, if you read this, please take note-
Your family will always love you, no matter what,
You will NEVER be forgotten,
The door is always open,you just need to shout,
Please don't be a stranger, get in touch,
I long for you to be knocking at the door to say can I come in,
Rather than the police asking us to identify a body.
There is help out there for you,
Please just ask,
If it's the last thing I ever do,
I will fight for justice until the bitter end
I Love you babes & always will
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